A good character is the best tombstone. Those who loved you and were helped by you will remember you when forget-me-nots have withered. Carve your name on hearts, not on marble. -Charles H. Spurgeon
Just yesterday Marcus Sheridan of The Sales Lion was talking about online relationships on his blog. Do the relationships we make online really matter? Are they as binding as the ones we form in our “physical” lives? He went into detail of why he believes they do.
A great post AND I just recently had an experience that solidified Marcus’ opinion.
Online relationships do matter.
For the past couple of months I’ve been blessed to develop a friendship with Rob of Today Has Power.
He does a lot for me. Always tweeting my posts, checking up on my health through email and generally caring. Often we’ll bring our discussions to email. We talk about life, hobbies, family and more. It’s been wonderful to connect with another blogger at such great depth.
Recently, Rob burst the bounds of connecting. Redefining. Teaching. Living by example.
He sent me a book.
It wasn’t just any book either. It was the Sibyl Sanderson Story. A book about a famous opera singer. A diva. What you may or may not know about myself is that I sing opera, and love anything involving the beautiful form of art.
What touched me most about Rob’s gesture is that he not only sent me a book (a kind thing to do in itself) but also sent one that mattered to me.
Through the sending of the book, Rob’s taught me to…
- Care enough about others that you take the time to listen.
- Show interest in other blogger’s hobbies, lives and ventures.
- Be real. Be human. Be genuine.
- Send a book to another blogger!
So, thank you Rob.
What do you do to show your care and interest for other bloggers?
*I just returned from a week-long trip to the California coast with my grandparents. We camped in a 5th wheel and enjoyed riding bikes, shopping and sunbathing in and around Sunset Beach, Santa Cruz and Mendocino. Updates on the trip will be posted on my personal blog shortly. The above post photo is me at the Old Fisherman’s Wharf in Mendocino.
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"You’re such a smart boy!" were his first accolades heard. So, it’s no wonder that this phrase became the title of his business, Smart Boy Designs.
Read more about Christian 
{ 33 comments… read them below or add one }
Relationship are very important..you see me on your blog right. Im not here fro my health, I’m here to leave a comment or two and plus do a little networking.
“Black Seo Guy “Signing Off”
TrafficColeman recently posted..TrafficColeman Statement For May 2011
Twitter: smartboydesigns
June 3, 2011 at 9:46 am
I like that Coleman. You’re not here for your health. You don’t HAVE to be here. You’d survive without. BUT you choose to, because it’s a great way to connect.
And I SURE DO APPRECIATE IT!
Twitter: lance02
June 3, 2011 at 10:56 am
Christian,
What a very cool thing that Rob did!
And that’s one of those things which makes me believe so much in this community – the care and support that’s there.
I’ve been blessed with a couple of wonderful and thoughtful books, I’ve had a place to stay, I’ve had rides, and more – from caring bloggers who have taken that next step in really creating a meaningful friendship…
Lance recently posted..My Blog Transformed My Life
Twitter: smartboydesigns
June 3, 2011 at 11:18 am
Isn’t it incredible, Lance?
It’s great to hear you’ve had such strong support from others in the community. It really makes such a large difference in all of our lives, when we choose to support another.
What’s great about blogging is you spend some time building up your relationship for some time with other bloggers – and then by the time you meet in person, you’re already a brilliant friend!
That’s right Lance. I think everyone of us needs care and support to challenge our life for the new things that comes up.
Ricka Henz recently posted..Clearance Samsung Galaxy S Deals On Contract In The UK
Hey Christian,
As you already know, I think highly of you for a number of reasons:
You leave footprints of joy where you’ve tread. Too many to count.
You are family minded. See post: “Mom, stop teaching me about blogging!”
You give more than receive. Excessive tweeting, commenting, etc.
You are doing things in an excellent way (I thank your parents for this, also). Building, sharing, giving.
You are a go-getter who loves life. Dog sledding anyone?
You are a sponge for knowledge. Polyface, Inc.
You make a difference in lives. The Spurgeon quote fits you well, and it’s just begun. I feel wonderful everytime I visit here. A breath of fresh air.
And, of course, you…Live it LOUD!
I was going to leave this in an email but we’re among friends…The book was written by Jack Winsor Hansen. He autographed the inside cover for you. He’s in Who’s Who in America. He’s been playing piano for over 60 years. He has perfect pitch (not the Nolan Ryan type:)
But, most of all he is a piano teacher extraordinaire who has been blessing my daughter for 9 years. He has taken a seed and nurtured it.
Christian, you are a blessing. Thank you. I look forward to hearing you perform at La Scala.
Rob recently posted..Are You Ready Make It Happen
Twitter: smartboydesigns
June 3, 2011 at 4:44 pm
Well, thank you Rob. That’s certainly a kind compliment for you to leave here. I really can’t say much more than that.
and…
La Scala, here I come!
Rob, I am living vicariously through your “bro love” for Christian. I tell ya, from all the good things I keep hearing about CH, I feel like we’ve been friends forever. I can relate to your stories here quite a bit. Though I can be a bit of a salty dog at times (I blame my battle scars from being in the IT field LOL), I’m mostly a people person and an optimist. Every comment CH leaves is so positive and it’s nice to see that in such a bitter space.. Of course, the more crass insultants have their place too (we all could use a swift kick to the bum at times).
Yomar recently posted..YOUR Personal Memorial Day- Remembering Uncomfortable Truths And Doing Something About It
Twitter: smartboydesigns
June 4, 2011 at 9:06 pm
You’ve got to have the ying for the yang, the bitter for the sweet. Otherwise, it just doesn’t work. I appreciate the other spectrum – as it’s good sometimes. And trust me, I’m not always positive. I can certainly get down too!
Really glad you open another page – so I can look at @todayhaspower next. I know you via @dino_dogan tweets. It would appear u Triberr people ARE becoming “inbred,” haha. Yes, I also am finding the blog people make fat friends. Lots going on betwen Triberr people. Good to “meet” you!
Saul Fleischman recently posted..The First Triberr Unauthorised All-Day Online Party
Twitter: smartboydesigns
June 3, 2011 at 10:22 pm
Thanks Saul. The Triberr world is fantastic. So many supportive bloggers who engage, love and encourage. I don’t think I would be where I am today without Dino and Triberr. They’ve been incredible for me.
Hey Saul! I’m in YOUR tribe.. Fancy meeting you here!
I need to look into this in-breeding stuff. Even though I talk to Dino often, I’m a bit behind on my tribal rituals, so to speak. Certainly, if not anything else, I love the fact that Triberr has allowed me to meet folks like yourself. I would not have met many of you otherwise!
I met Christian through Dino but there was someone else that gave him BIG props before Dino.. I believe it was Eugene or Robert Dempsey. All great guys!
Yomar recently posted..YOUR Personal Memorial Day- Remembering Uncomfortable Truths And Doing Something About It
Relationships go much further than credentials. I notice bloggers that focus more on warm connections and authenticity rely a lot less on sharing cookie-cutter success stories and proverbial resumes online. You never know who can become a good friend or even a business partner. I, for one, do not differentiate online from offline, though it’s always nice to go beyond cyberspace.
Fun Fact: I’ve been checking out your blog after many spoke about your character and honesty. To me, that means more than any knowledge or insight you could share. I’m sure I’m not alone on this feeling. =o)
Twitter: smartboydesigns
June 3, 2011 at 10:27 pm
Focusing on authenticity versus credentials. I’m really surprised by this comment. It gets me thinking.
You know, you’re digging into something very deep here. Something that could take years to discuss and organize. Doesn’t it seem that so many of those success stories COME from individuals who lived a life of struggle, and maybe not a life of credentials? I think of all the people I admire. Family members. Father. Mother, etc…My father is a successful business man – yet doesn’t even have a college degree. Another individual I know is the most kindhearted, tender person; yet abused others in his past.
You’re getting me thinking – and I appreciate that Yomar.
Thank you for stopping by here at Smart Boy Designs. I really do appreciate the support and kindness. Grateful to hear that character and honesty is coming across. That’s important to me. Above anything else really.
I’m with you on this, my friend!
Success stories based on authentic experiences, not mere credentials, really speak to me. My mother did not have a college education but she worked hard all her life. She is truly selfless individual and that inspires me to challenge all my thoughts every day. I am with you here, bud!
I’m glad I got you thinking. That’s what I try to do in my blogs and comments.. I find myself thinking out loud and the conversations that often follow help us grow mutually. That’s part of the magic of the Internet!
With regards to living a life of struggle, there’s no doubt that such trials and tribulations either make us or break us. We have to be able to recognize the urgency and determine our course of action. Some folks play the victim card when adversity strikes, others take things on as learning experiences. It’s all a matter of perspective.
That said, one thing I think is important is to find like-minded people that share our vision. This creates more urgency and helps us keep ourselves in check. I like to call such folks “work-out buddies” and, if you’re lucky, the relationship evolves into a real friendship (and not the Facebook variety).
Pardon me.. I get a bit long-winded, as you may notice from my blog. It’s very.. content-heavy.
Chat with you again soon, CH!
Twitter: smartboydesigns
June 4, 2011 at 9:08 pm
It’s so wonderful to hear about how much your Mother has influenced your life. She sounds like an incredible individual. Working hard for others; that’s really what it’s all about.
I sure hope that I can keep working on my perspective. Make it grow. Take the time to nurture myself, so that I see the adversity as something good to grow from. It’s certainly great to have people like you in my network and on-board; keeping me going in that general direction. Of making things work, pushing harder, and striving to make all the negative a learning experience in life!
Like I said over on TSL, I said the relationships people form online are real.
There’s so many people from many different backgrounds that I’ve met online so far. All great people and doing great things like yourself!
Hey Christian –
I just had to comment here. I know its a bit off topic but I just noticed you got Adsense back on your website. Congrats! Glad to hear they unbanned you!!! Hopefully you can start making some big bucks again.
I just recently put adsense back on my blog. I tried without it for awhile. It made my blog cleaner but I couldn’t afford not to have it on my blog. The extra money is always useful to have for all your hard work and dedication to your blog.
—-
Now as for your blog post. I 100% agree that online relationships DO matter! I really appreciate my friendship I’ve made with you online. I’ve learnt a lot from you and really appreciate it. I’ve also got connected with a lot of other bloggers through your website! Keep up the great work Christian.
Twitter: smartboydesigns
June 4, 2011 at 9:10 pm
Yes, I’m back into Adsense now. I’m going to start off small, document my experiences, tweak, experiment – and then write my thoughts on the process. Hoping to see what I might do to help the Adsense community.
And I’ve surely been grateful to have made a friend with yourself online. It’s been fantastic to get to know you, your work, life and read your blog. It’s always great to have friends who care, that are just a click away!
Twitter: justonecookbook
June 4, 2011 at 5:48 pm
Hi Christian! Are/were you in Monterey? I love the picture of you.
I think meeting online is just one place we meet people, just like we meet in school, work, bar, you know anywhere. I think soon people will stop thinking negative things about dating online because internet becomes a part of life and world just gets smaller and smaller. I used to have a pen pal when I was small and I consider online friend is just the same thing. We build relationship as we write/visit blogs each other. Because I know for sure, when we meet each other one day, we won’t think we just met. I think it’s nice to have a mix of friends – virtually and not virtually.
Nami recently posted..Spring Rolls with Sesame Ponzu Vinaigrette
Twitter: smartboydesigns
June 4, 2011 at 9:12 pm
That’s a great thought Nami. Penpalls. Certainly true. I had a penpal when I was younger who lived in New Zealand, and we chatted often here and there. You’re right – it’s much the same!
Yes, I was in Monterey last week on Memorial day. We biked past the aquarium (one of my FAVORITE places) and down to the rock point. We then went to Old Fisherman’s Wharf for a bit too. It’s beautiful down there. I love it.
How great is it that through blogging such good friendships are developed. I would never have thought this possible until it happened with me. A group of us post everyday on a blog that one person started and we have so much in common that we ended up planning a vacation together. At first I was hesitant about jetting off to meet everyone, safety in numbers I guess, there are 5 of us. Well we had the best time and its 3 years later and it’s an annual event, so yes friendships are made through blogs.
We each take the time to celebrate the good and comfort through the bad times. Blogging just seems so natural when you care.
Speaking a caring, that’s great that you spend a week with your grandparents. Treasure that time, because those are memories you’ll carry forever!
McKenna recently posted..High Speed Industrial Doors
Twitter: smartboydesigns
June 7, 2011 at 11:26 am
That’s amazing! A trip together. Who would have ever thought that was possible. Minds certainly would have been blown ten years ago, with such a thought!
Where did you end up going?
My grandparents are certainly a big part of my life. They’re still only in their late 60′s, and younger, so it’s great to continue building memories with them that I can carry with me. They’re like a second set of parents to me.
Christian,
I read the article over at The sales lion that you mention and now that i have read your post i feel such relief.
You see, over the last 3 months, i’ve started to get to know about people through their blogs. And i have felt a strange twinge of guilt for thinking, these people online have the potential to be better friends or as close friends as some of my face to face friends. This felt odd to me. I guess it’s Hard to let go of old ideologies that online friends can’t be REAL FRIENDS.
Then i read Marcus’s blog and he being the wise person that he is, he made me feel normal for feeling a connection to people whom i may have never met and only spoken to via email, or twitter or comments or skype.
Now here i see what a wonderful thing Rob did for you and it’s truly inspiring. I met rob online about a month ago and he does truly rock. It’s so inspiring and it restores my faith in humanity anew. Thanks for posting
See you online.
Annie Andre recently posted..How To Travel Like A Gypsy- Video Update Where Is Annie And Family
Twitter: smartboydesigns
June 7, 2011 at 11:27 am
You’re welcome Annie. I’m glad I was able to calm your quails and fears. It’s certainly difficult sometimes to understand why those online become such great friends.
I think part of it is that in real-life you’re limited to the map. A few select individuals. When you’re writing online – the ones who have like personalities, thoughts and ideals gravitate towards each other.
Twitter: berget
June 6, 2011 at 10:23 am
Hi Christian,
This is exactly what I am reading about in the Thank You Economy by Gary V. He is sending stuff to his customers all the time (in order to create a strong bond). I have received a few books myself, but they’ve been either because they wanted me to write reviews or because I have won a contest
I agree that online relationships are just as strong as offline. I have received a lot of awesome friends online, and I “talk” to them every single day, more often than my regular friends offline.
Jens
Jens P. Berget recently posted..You don’t have to be Jerry Seinfeld to be running a kick-ass business
Twitter: smartboydesigns
June 7, 2011 at 11:35 am
Gary certainly understands the friendship and bond between customers and business. He pushes the boundaries in everything he’s doing; and teaches us all in the process.
What are some things you’re changing, after reading his book?
Twitter: wonderoftech
June 7, 2011 at 2:30 pm
Hi Christian, I absolutely agree that online friendships matter. I have even turned some online friendships into face to face friendships and have made some extremely close friends because of it.
My biggest issue is I have to tell my kids not to do that because the internet can be a very scary place. I’m afraid I have set a horrible example for them!
I was fascinated to learn of your love of opera. You certainly have many talents and interests! I’m so glad one of them is blogging.
Carolyn recently posted..WWDC- A Slice of Apple’s Future
Twitter: smartboydesigns
June 7, 2011 at 4:24 pm
I’m afraid I’ve set a bad example for my brothers, so I feel like we’re in the same boat. Not only in that regard – but spending time on the computer. I make my living online, so obviously spend ample time online, but don’t want them to think that’s necessary. If your job isn’t the computer – don’t get on so much!
Thank you for your kind compliment. Always happy to have you here.
Do you like opera? Most haven’t been exposed to it much, but it’s sure beautiful!
It’s a thin line to tread, really. To an extent, we are all hypocrites but that’s human nature: we learn, we challenge, we evolve.
I find that computers enhance all areas of business but, certainly, there are extreme situations. I’ve been known to go into hermit mode when I start writing, programming, reading, or playing video games.. But I’m more of a lifestyle computer geek: it’s a vital part of my life yet it does not define me, you know?
Carolyn, the best thing I recommend is educating kids about the risks and benefits of the Internet. One thing they have to live with is the fact that your online identity will carry more weight than any resume or paper credentials. This will be the case for many years, decades, and maybe centuries to come.
Everything we do exposes us in some way. Blogging is possibly one of the most intimate communication mediums out there: it makes us vulnerable but it also makes us credible, relatable, and approachable. With every benefit, there is a risk. It’s all a matter of perspective. I like to balance a little paranoia with a big dose of selflessness. Take the plunge but be aware of the risks that come with that, I say!
For kids, I say stay away from social networking sites, mainly because some kids these days do not have a filter. Sadly, there are some bad parents out there that give their kids a free pass to do as they wish.. That is what sets the real bad example and you can only shelter your kids so much.
True Story: A friend of a kid in my family posted on their Facebook recently about how they got away with cheating on their exam. They proceeded to call their teacher a “dinosaur” and an “effin’ idiot” (with more vulgar terminology, of course), in spite being warned by adult supervisors that it was not smart to brag about that, let alone commit the dasterdly deed.
Interestingly enough *innocent whistle*, the teacher got an anonymous tip about the Facebook post (mind you, the profile was open and VERY easy to find).. That changed the kid’s perspective about how tech-savvy us “dinosaurs” are. Yes, I have a mean streak sometimes but you really have to lay down the law and guide these younger generations. Respect mah authoritay! =oP
Yomar recently posted..Would You Rather Live In A House Alone On The Hills A Lesson In People Skills
Twitter: wonderoftech
June 8, 2011 at 5:06 pm
Yomar, that’s a fascinating story about the kid on Facebook who admitted to cheating. He learned a valuable lesson the hard way. I also like your comment about the fact that your online reputation is more important than your paper credentials. That makes so much sense. Most of us have an online personality and it’s easy to find. It’s much more difficult to hide your flaws on the internet so be very careful about what you say!
Christian, I love opera. My husband introduced me to it and we have been to some amazing productions. Maybe you will post a video someday enriching us with your talents?
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Now that was a wonderful thing for Rob to do. I didn’t know you sang opera; I listen to opera, but fought singing it when I used to take voice. lol
You’re right about bloggers and making friends online. In a strange way I feel more connected to many people around the world with whom I’ve made a connection, mainly through blogging, than many people who live close to me. I’m not sure whether that says good things about people elsewhere or bad things about how I interact with people locally.
Mitch Mitchell recently posted..This Week- I Cut Back Some
Twitter: smartboydesigns
June 8, 2011 at 12:21 am
Maybe it’s a mixture Mitch.